Printing on your Latte

Coffee, Women and Koreans

In Boston, someone found out that men are served faster in coffeeshops. They said that it takes 20 seconds faster for the men to get their latte. They cry, discrimination. In Starbucks in Baguio, the Koreans are served longer. It's hard to cry discrimination if you take into account that they comprise 70 percent of the customers there. Yes, it's more of the language problem. But 15 days into the Starbucks diary promo, a barista told me that dozens of Koreans there already claimed theirs. That's a lot of beans!

Cellphone Law

While getting meat for my story a while back, I called up a source and dialed a wrong number. So somebody else answered and saying sorry and waiting for the angry answer took one minute and one second. Then another call. Another wrong number. When I finally got the right number, a girl answered, "The number you dialed can not be reached." Then later, a busy signal. Then a choppy signal. Oh, I realized I was within the "Law of the Cellphone" which states, If you dial a wrong number, you never get a busy signal.
Other laws, actually corollaries of Murphy's Law, are as follows:

Law of Mechanical Repair: After your hands become coated with grease, your nose will begin to itch or you'll have to pee.
Law of the Workshop: Any tool, when dropped, will roll to the least accessible corner, even if it is square.
Law of Visual Probability: The probability of being watched is directly proportional to the stupidity of your act.
Law of the Alibi: If you tell the boss you were late for work because you had a flat tire, the very next morning you will have a flat tire.
Variation Law: If you change traffic lanes, the one you were in will start to move faster than the one you are in now.
Law of the Bath: When the body is fully immersed in water, the telephone rings.
Law of Close Encounters: The probability of meeting someone you know increases when you are with someone you don't want to be seen with.
Law of the Result: When you try to prove to someone that a machine won't work, it will.
Law of Bio-mechanics: The severity of the itch is inversely proportional to the reach.
Law of the Theater: At any event, the people whose seats are furthest from the aisle arrive last.
Law of Coffee Temperature: As soon as you sit down to a cup of hot coffee, your boss will ask you to do something which will last until the coffee is cold.
Law of Lockers: If there are only two people in a locker room, they will have adjacent lockers.
Law of Rugs/Carpets: The chances of an open-faced jelly sandwich landing face down on a floor covering are directly correlated to the cost of the carpet.
Law of Logical Argument: Anything is possible if you don't know what you are talking about.
Brown's Law: If the shoe fits, it's ugly.
Oliver's Law: A closed mouth gathers no feet.
Wilson's Law: As soon as you find a product that you really like, they will stop making it.
Law of Location: No matter where you go, there you are

Kape, Pare

Just came from Manila. Ginagawa ko nang Quiapo ang Manila. And everytime I go there, people tell me I bring the rains.
Well back in Baguio, had a taste test at Starbucks. I didn't know that they give free lectures about gourmet coffee as long as you can gather enough people and give the Starbucks people two weeks to prepare. This is their way of weaning people away from just your usual frapuccino and kapi-ti-native.

The Coffee War

“It is disgusting to note the increase in the quantity of coffee used by my subjects and the amount of money that goes out of the country in consequence. Everybody is using coffee. If possible this must be prevented. My people must drink beer. His Majesty was brought up on beer, and so were his officers. Many battles have been fought and won by soldiers nourished on beer; and the King does not believe that coffee-drinking soldiers can be depended upon to endure hardships or to beat his enemies in case of occurrence of another war.” Frederick the Great of Prussia

“There are various theories as to what characteristics, what combination of traits, what qualities in our men won the war. This democratic heritage is highly thought of: the instinctive mechanical know-how of thousands of our young men is frequently cited: the church and Coca-cola, baseball and the movies all come in for their share of credit; but, speaking from my own observation of our armed forces, I should say the war was won on coffee.” Ilka Chase.