Beer

“There are human epidemiological data of others indicating that mild [to] moderate drinking may paradoxically improve cognition in people compared to abstention,” says Maggie Kalev, a research fellow in molecular medicine and pathology at the University of Auckland in New Zealand and a co-author of an article in The Journal of Neuroscience describing results of a study she and other researchers performed on rats. “This is similar to a glass of wine protecting against heart disease, however the mechanism is different.”

If you said, Ha? That means you have not drank beer in a while. Because what it said was that a group of smart Kiwis found out that a glass of beer or two makes you more intelligent while if you decide to just watch TV, you are still stupid. Or something.