Monday, June 04, 2007

Reasons to Toast The Month of June (From Frank Rich's Modern Drunkard with minor revisions)

  1. Founding of Latrobe Brewing Co. in 1939. The “33” on Rolling Rock bottle is an homage to a typo error. Also Nonette B’s birthday. Let’s give a belated drink to the reigning beer drinking champion of Shakey’s Skyworld.
  2. Vandals sacked Rome (477)

Fall of Rome is made of 2 oz. dry vermouth and I oz brandy. Give dashes of sherry and Rose’s Lime Juice then fill the whole thing with orange juice. Top with brandy and serve with straw.

  1. Cain murdered Abel. Let your bro pay for your drinks.
  2. Happy Birthday to Etot Tamayo and philosopher Socrates (both 469 BC).
  3. Pancho Villa’s Birthday in 1878. What was his last words? "Don’t let it end like this. Tell them I said something."
  4. D-Day Anniversary. How can drunkards like Churchill and Franklin Delano Roosevelt annihilate Hitler who was a teetotaler? That should give you a time to think it out while drinking Ginebra San Miguel.
  5. Dean Martin’s birthday in 1917. Rat Packer and originator of classic quotes like “It was a woman who drove me to drink, come to think of it I never did hang around to thank her for that" and Hey lady! do I look all blurry to you? 'Cause you look blurry to me!'” and “If you drink don't drive. Don't even putt.”
  6. Name Your Poison Day.
  7. The Witch is Dead Day. Carrie Nation who brought US the Prohibition died in 1911.
  8. A.A. established. So Long, Sucker is the drink for you. S.L.S. is a mixture of I oz. each of Absolut Kurant and Citron and Apple Pucker and Blue Maui. Shake with ice and strain.
  9. For PGMA moving our Independence Day holiday to this day. We shall not be moved.
  10. Let’s drink for our independence. Drink tuba or basi.
  11. Alexander the Great drinks himself to death in 323 BC
  12. The birthday of Che Guevara. Tequila for you then ride that motorcycle.
  13. Birthday of Waylon Jennings.
  14. Buddhist Day of the Rat. Never rat on a rat is the Rat Pack’s motto.
  15. Battle for Bunker Hill.
  16. Battle of Waterloo. Cognac and gin then listen to ABBA’s Waterloo
  17. Miller High Life in 1902.
  18. Birthday of Errol Flynn.
  19. Gin and Tonic Season begins in the US.
  20. Zeppelin Day. Flaming Hindenburg is made of 1 oz Bacardi 151, ½ oz peppermint schnapps, ½ oz Southern Comfort, ½ of tequila. With Bacardi on top, ignite. Blow it out and then shoot.
  21. St. Agripina’s Day, the patron saint of leprosy, thunder and evil spirits.
  22. Aztec Feast of the Sun. Be like the call center agents, drink in the middle of the day.
  23. Custer’s Last Stand.
  24. Bicycle patented in 1819. W.C. Fields said that scotch needs water like a fish needs a bicycle.
  25. Julian the Blessed Festival.
  26. Paul Bunyan Day
  27. St. Peter’s Day.
  28. Superman leaped in 1938.

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Blogger frank cimatu said...

This photo of Superman is being used by scholars as proof that he is the Anti-Christ

10:51 AM  

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