Apres Moi, Le Barrage du Text

Wednesday night while dining at Forest House, I got this text understandable enough from an unlisted number:

On Mon., we'll have a NEW PRESIDENT. This will be the scenario. AIRFORCE will withdraw their support on GMA, followed by MARINES, ARMY & PNP. The heads of these military services have NO MORE RESPECT for ESPERON. People will converge in EDSA SHRINE early morning. Please pray for peaceful & non-violent transition. Let's pray that GMA and her cabinet members will not hold on to their positions or else this will lead to BLOODY REVOLUTION. See you on Monday!

Late last night, I got a text from a friend in the intelligence service. First, it listed Jun Lozada's two CP numbers. It also said:

Feel free 2 ask him d TRUTH!Magkanong PATRIOTIC FUND binayad ni Jamby sayo para ka magsinungaling?Bakit ka pa humingi ng pera kay Gaite, e binigyan ka pala ng P3M pocket money ni ErnieCanlas of Gilmark, contractor of Binay when u went 2 HK?Ano pinag usapan ni JoeydeV ng sinunadan ka nya sa HK?Magkano ba 1kl Jathropa,P15/kl.d ba? ba't mo binenta ng P115/kl?Ba't di naka red plate Camry mo e binayaran yan ng Philforest? Pls pass asap,

I asked my intelligence friend why did he have to send me a text equivalent to P4 twice?

May funding ka ba? Papasaload naman so I can send your message?

He didn't so I wouldn't. Where are the funny and witty texts of EDSA II? I wouldn't waste my money passing these around. I didn't know that text revolution could be this prosaic.