Limericks

There was a cono from old Iloilo
Whose lineage was royal through and through
This is rather sad
For not only his blood
But even his semen was blue

There was a young dancer from Manilla
Who flavored her organ with vanilla
The taste was so fine
Men and beast stood in line
Including a stray armadillo

A poet of the UP Writing Center
Had a tool of enormous diameter
But it wasn’t the size
That brought tears to her eyes.
Twas the rhythm – dactylic hexameter.

There’s a politician named Pings
Who bragged about women, drugs and things.
But his secret desire
Was a cadet in the choir
With a bottom like jelly on springs.

There’s a cute politician named Glo
Who filled her you-know-what with glue.
She said with her characteristic chagrin,
“If I paid so much to get in
They’ll have to pay more to get out."

Tim Yap, our dashing social columnist
Went to a costume ball by Greenpeace.
He was draped as a tree
Having failed to foresee
Dogs, cats and guests making pila to piss.